I love Thanksgiving. And I am grateful for so many things this week - it has been a year of accelerated change in every facet of my life.
I jot down these words as I sit in a hotel room in Sheridan, Wyoming. Sheridan? How the heck did I end up here?
When I contemplate this question, I think of a little book that some cherished contributors and I released last year. “THE DIFFERENCE: Essays on Loss, Courage, and Personal Transformation,” published by Balboa Press, a Division of Hay House.
And I think of a quote from William Hutchison Murray that has been a North Star in my life, ever since I first heard it in the 1990s.
Until one is committed, there is hesitancy,
the chance to draw back.
Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation),
there is one elementary truth,
the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans.
That the moment one definitely commits oneself,
then Providence moves too.
Deciding to put out THE DIFFERENCE began with a commitment. The rest was kinda easy.
Exceptional colleagues agreed to contribute. Their contributions were deep, personal, and inspiring.
That’s Providence.
The reactions from readers to THE DIFFERENCE were resoundingly positive. Folks were moved by the wise and richly vulnerable writing in the book. Because they were moved, our readers bought additional copies to share with people they loved.
That’s Providence.
To this day, my co-authors and I receive weekly notes and messages from folks who are stirred by the voices in THE DIFFERENCE.
Yes, more Providence.
I served, alongside my friend Rosemary Ravinal, as editor for the book, and I also contributed a very personal essay, When I Was Willing To Try Anything.
Then Providence waved its magic wand.
My memoirist writing had been published in numerous anthologies in the 1990s. It had garnered a PEN Syndicated Fiction Award, among other accolades.
The heartfelt reactions to my essay in THE DIFFERENCE prompted me to say “hey, I want to return to more of this very personal writing. Let me work on a full memoir.”
They also prompted me to admit to myself that there was some other material I wished to write – and that this material wanted to be a novel.
Concurrently, I began to see that the podcast I host, MY FOURTH ACT, is another form of very personal storytelling, not unlike my memoirist writing.
More dots connected.
Providence. So much Providence.
I moved to Portugal this year, for a multitude of reasons. One very specific one was my desire to live in a physical place that would allow for more time to slow down and write.
In the 1990s, I was blessed to receive invitations to some extraordinary artist sanctuaries to just come and write. Toward the end of 2023, I thought to myself, let me apply and see if I will be invited again.
I was a 2024 MacDowell Fellow earlier this year where I spent a month working on a memoir based on my material in THE DIFFERENCE.
I am also a 2024 Ucross Fellow. I’m about to spend several weeks at the Ucross Foundation, just outside of Sheridan. A 20,000 acre estate in the stunning Wyoming wilderness. I will be working on the same book.
And I will have this year’s Thanksgiving meal in the company of 10 other gifted artists – writers, painters, composers – here at Ucross.
A year and a half ago, when we published THE DIFFERENCE, I would not have been able to show you Sheridan on the map.
That’s how it works.
It began with a commitment. A commitment to the commitment. And faith in the wisdom of what William Hutchinson Murray instilled in me, back in the day.
This week, as you contemplate the events and people you are grateful for, contemplate the role Providence plays in your life.
If you tend to shy away from commitment, consider where you might commit more fully, sooner, and with less doubt.
And if you have not read THE DIFFERENCE and yearn for a bit of inspiration, go to your favorite online bookseller and get yourself a copy. It will set a bit of Providence in motion for you, of that I am sure.
I have had many companions in my journey back to some very personal writing. Immense gratitude goes to my co-editor Rosemary Ravinal, and to the exceptional humans who have inspired me with their writing in THE DIFFERENCE: Carl Ficks Jr.; Dr. Betsey Guerra; Alisa Sample-Alexander; Caroline de Posada; Dr. Tom Garcia; Dr. Lynne Maureen Hurdle; Mark J. Silverman; and Malissa Smith.
Thank you for being part of my Providence. Let us keep on committing, shall we!
